What Would Brian Do?
Or "why I'm jealous of people I don't even know."
I just realized that the cinderella kid four blogs over is having a kind of popularity boom. He's got like seventeen sniveling readers (myself included) who run around his blog and post comments every day just to be "in on" whatever he says. Reading, rereading and waiting for the next post, even if all he says is, "I got nothing." I mean, what the hell, Brian? How do you do it?
And then I got serious. I asked myself, "Self, what do you want from your blog? What do you really want from all this? What is your goal?" And that's when it hit me: I don't know what the hell I'm doing. I mean, to tell the truth, I just jump from scatterbrained thing to thing on my blog without caring or thinking about what I'm doing. Which is what Brian does. Sorta. Except he writes more content. It's more personalized. Like the bed wetting thing. That's really honest. So I don't really have that going. And unlike Brian, my readership doesn't consist of gigglers and smiley-facers who end their comments with things like xxxooo and "U R Soooo kul!" and a bunch of winky smiles. I mean, for crying out loud! The only readers I have are engineers and tax preparers, web analysts and school administrators. And they don't always post a comment either. Most are content to sift through the strange data I have collected, take a token link and be on their merry way. Sure they visit, but they don't say anything. And the fact that they don't feel compelled to comment intrigues me. Is it because they have nothing to say? Perhaps. Is it because I don't say anything? Possibly. I mean, I very rarely write about myself. I am about the only thing I don't write about. I write about Southern Right Wales and ten ton chickens and the latest soho images. But I'll be damned if I'm gonna write out a story about what's going on now or about what happened to me in the recess yard in the fourth grade when that prig Natalie told everybody I liked Brandon before I could decide if I really did or not.
Well, I've decided to change all that! I've decided to get my blog with the evolutionary program! Using Brian as my role model (poor bastard), whenever I post, I'll stop and ask, "How would Brian misspell this?" or "What would Brian say here to get a smiley face?" and that's what I'll write. I promise you'll still get your quirky links. But now with more personal stories...
...if I can think of one.
I just realized that the cinderella kid four blogs over is having a kind of popularity boom. He's got like seventeen sniveling readers (myself included) who run around his blog and post comments every day just to be "in on" whatever he says. Reading, rereading and waiting for the next post, even if all he says is, "I got nothing." I mean, what the hell, Brian? How do you do it?
And then I got serious. I asked myself, "Self, what do you want from your blog? What do you really want from all this? What is your goal?" And that's when it hit me: I don't know what the hell I'm doing. I mean, to tell the truth, I just jump from scatterbrained thing to thing on my blog without caring or thinking about what I'm doing. Which is what Brian does. Sorta. Except he writes more content. It's more personalized. Like the bed wetting thing. That's really honest. So I don't really have that going. And unlike Brian, my readership doesn't consist of gigglers and smiley-facers who end their comments with things like xxxooo and "U R Soooo kul!" and a bunch of winky smiles. I mean, for crying out loud! The only readers I have are engineers and tax preparers, web analysts and school administrators. And they don't always post a comment either. Most are content to sift through the strange data I have collected, take a token link and be on their merry way. Sure they visit, but they don't say anything. And the fact that they don't feel compelled to comment intrigues me. Is it because they have nothing to say? Perhaps. Is it because I don't say anything? Possibly. I mean, I very rarely write about myself. I am about the only thing I don't write about. I write about Southern Right Wales and ten ton chickens and the latest soho images. But I'll be damned if I'm gonna write out a story about what's going on now or about what happened to me in the recess yard in the fourth grade when that prig Natalie told everybody I liked Brandon before I could decide if I really did or not.
Well, I've decided to change all that! I've decided to get my blog with the evolutionary program! Using Brian as my role model (poor bastard), whenever I post, I'll stop and ask, "How would Brian misspell this?" or "What would Brian say here to get a smiley face?" and that's what I'll write. I promise you'll still get your quirky links. But now with more personal stories...
...if I can think of one.
Labels: blogging, childhood, friends, history, journal, whining
posted by k_sra at 8/17/2004 07:49:00 AM
19 Comments:
(off topic)Things I wish Blogger had:
1. Random numbers in the URL (like the halfbakery) so that my browser automatically refreshes the page when I show up. Often I have to hit "refresh" before new content shows up.
2. +, - system (like the halfbakery) so that [k] would have some measure of the likability of her posts. Smiley faces in the annos are not a terribly reliable likability indicator. Of course this dives into some interesting territory of self worth - if I get more +'s than you am I a more interesting person, or do I just have more friends? Perhaps a +/viewer and -/viewer ratio? But even then you're just looking at the quantity of responses versus the quality. For instance, "Fear Factor" would likely have more +'s by it if people could add +'s to such things than say "Nova", though "Nova" is clearly a much better show. Which leads us to the concept of what one means by better... (/off topic)
I almost forgot. :-) LOL U R Soooo kul!
Ah, thanks, Worldly! You're my number one fan! : )
Including Dr. Maluf?
Good old Maluf. *chuckle* My brother calls him Muh-loof. You should have seen the look he didn't give me on the bus this morning. Poor old codger. Speaking of which, my bro-in-law urges me to "see his paintings" and offered to come with.
I've always thought you should. Bring your brother in law and a camera. Have your bil take a picture of you and him and the paintings. You owe your readers this much. Or nothing. You may owe your readers nothing. I always get those two confused.
See, and here I always thought my readers owed me something. Tomayto tomahto.
However you pronounce it let me know your address and I'll send you one. Strange price, but I think the blog's worth it.
+++ skip to muh-loof my darlin' You tell your stories. You have a gift for prose.
And yes, you do owe it to your readers to post Maluf's paintings. But think of the yuckiness of riding the bus with him after that. "Oh, there you are Miss Hoagland! I was so hoping to see you again this morning, and might I say that you look very fetching in that flimsy linen blouse..." ad nauseum Okay, so maybe you owe nothing. Right. LOL xxoo U Rule
Note to self, throw out flimsy linens...
I can't believe you told people I wet the bed!
Oh, and that "what would Brian do" idea... I'd advise against that. Trust me on this one.
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Ummm, I obviously still don't know how to operate the feathers, so even though you've heard it before, let's just pretend that my K-affirmation bears repeating. :) It's all kul.
Mrs. Noble Aloof, when I heard that you were doubting yourself, I knew that I had to write and tell you that your blog changed- no, make that SAVED- my life. I had gone from Oprah to Phil (with a bad Judy month in there somewhere) and was still unhappy. I was still CUTTING out pages of fashion magazines, DRINKING Odwalla Superfood by the gallon, and TAKING DRUGS to fend off my crazy Nawlins pollen allergies and otherwise endangering my health and sanity. In my despair, I had even become a PROMISCUOUS reality tv watcher. (That last really shamed my family who are All Too Cool To Get Caught Up In That Crap.) Then one day, Chez J called my ass and told me to check out the brave new world of blogging which had just sprang up n' shit. If it weren't for your film reviews and daily newnesses, I would still be a 90 lb. weakling with a chin full of spit. I thank God for you, K-sra! In fact, I am going to commission a Belfry, The poem to celebrate the impact your blog has had on me. (Do those three do commissions? Have to find out. Small detail really.) So keep riding the bus, luring old men to their romantic doom, linking me off the beaten path, and drinking Schlitz Malt Liquor. I, personally, kissah you face.
Come on now, snoot. Is that any way to talk?
Thanks for visiting. See you again... BB
Wow, thanks honest plus popular! Mind if I use you for product endorsement?
Brian, I promise I won't take it too far. I just needed a springboard, and you're so good with the people... *sniff*
Thanks, strangers, for stopping by and advertising your sites. You make me feel important and popular enough to be skimped off of! And that means a lot.
That K_sra is so hot right now!
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