College President Steps Down

A happy chorus of "Ding, Dong the Witch is Dead" rang through the halls of a local college in Cleveland today as the news was announced that the long-time President had "stepped down" that morning during an emergency meeting with the board of trustees. Staff members speculate that he was forced out due to the lack of advance notice or a goodbye party with cheesy banners and bad store bought cake. Many have expressed curiosity about how his wife will take the news. The couple were living in a mansion on campus with luxurious amenities including a jacuzzi and a double underground garage. It is rumored that the former President's wife has a chicken and rooster figurine collection numbering in the hundreds. No comment yet on how the figurines will be packed or transported as the couple vacate the campus housing arrangements they acquired two months ago.