A MERRY Scavenger Hunt, to One and All!

(wire man designed by Jamison, photo by k_sra)

Once a year we gather together with our families to celebrate this beloved season of Christmas. Every year I get a little glassy-eyed again over the story of Christ' birth, the intrepid journey of his parents to Bethlehem, the shepherds startled in the field, those three crazy wise men bringing gifts no child would want (OK, except maybe for the gold). All of it so mind-boggling, so unusual. And I sing Christmas carols that tell and retell the stories in four part harmony. I sing out Alleluias loud as I can, because in that moment, I too get to be an angel in a heavenly choir on a still cold winter night. I too, get to be the bearer of Good News. Christmas is and always will be a magical time for me. With or without Santa, with or without stockings, trees or candles. Christmas is a burnished eternal reminder that God was not too proud or too awesome to come be with us. Like a heavenly spy, He entered the humble domain of humanity and lived it so He could truly say, "I understand."

Perhaps you do not have a faith that leads you to the conclusion that there is a God, or perhaps your life lessons have led you to the conclusion that Jesus was merely a construct of organized religion and over-active imaginations. I respect that. My life lessons and my experiences have led me to be enthralled with the One I know loved me enough to take this journey by my side and who later sacrificed His experience so mine could be a better one.

This Christmas, the thought that makes my heart 'Merry' is Him, a man as God submitting to the humiliation of childbirth in a donkey's stall, wearing human skin and living in our presence and giving up His all for us so that we could truly live.

Merry Christmas!

Just Say No To Abstinence

Ohio did just that.

The abstinence-until-marriage programs in the state of Ohio recently came under heavy fire. The AIDS taskforce of Ohio asked that state funding for the no-sex-till-marriage programs be withheld until proof for their efficacy can be shown. The programs, which began under Pres. Clinton, took on added steam and additional funding under Bush (no surprise there). Ohio law requires sex ed to promote and "emphasize" that abstinence from sexual activity is the only 100% effective means of protecting oneself from STD's and unwanted pregnancy (ORC 3313.60). Whereas most non-profit organizations must match their government funds with their own funding, the state of Ohio matches the funds for the abstinence-only programs. The US government doesn't care who matches it, just so long as it's matched. But the Ohio AIDS taskforce does care. You see, the AIDS taskforce has to match their own funds and would much rather see state funds go directly to AIDS patients than to be 'thrown down the drain' in an attempt to rally Ohio teens around the no-nookie flagpole. You can't blame them. The abstinence only programs are not only syphoning off large amounts of state funding, they also blatantly advertise hetero-monogamy as "God's plan for our lives." As it turns out federal funding may not be used for religious purposes, don't you know, which gives the AIDS taskforce a nice little platform on which to launch an assault.

It's not the only platform though. Studies show that whereas the no-sex-till-wed programs muster a lot of enthusiasm, the numbers of STD's and pregnancies among the students who signed up to "keep themselves pure" were just as high as teens exposed to (no pun intended) "safe-sex" programs. In other words, it wasn't necessarily working.

I find this interesting; this battle raging over what to tell the kids. What will work best. What will make those pesky numbers of chlamydia and gonorrhea cases drop. How to get the number of teen pregnancies down, etc. It is already and has been for some time a wild, overgrown weed patch in our national psyche. A word to the wise is no longer sufficient. The world is dangerous and ignorance is anything but bliss.

But as for the notion that a child equipped with a condom is "safer" than a child without is a total crock. It does hurt a thirteen year old girl's feelings to get plowed under by some boy or man in their pursuit of the national past time. I remain unconvinced that there is any thirteen year old in this country who would benefit by having sex.

So... is Cheryl Biddle, executive director of Abstinence the Better Choice, justified in saying "we want to balance the scale" by continuing a message of abstinence only in Ohio and is that "balance" worth $455,000 in state funding? Or is the idea of preaching abstinence worth the government's money only if you also hand out cherry-flavored condoms?

One last thought before I descend my soap box:

Learning to put on a condom without also learning to protect your heart seems an ass-backwards way to protect the young of this country.

Philosophy Hour

Who is the bigger fool? The man who shouts, "There is a God!" in a godless universe? Or the man who stands with fists akimbo declaring, "There is NO god!" while the God of the universe looks on?

Conversations With My Boyfriend

Me: You know what one of the distinct advantages of walking on water would be?

BF: Are there any disadvantages to walking on water?

Me: Huh, no, I guess not. But one of the advantages is that you can get where you're going without any physical barriers or obstacles.

BF: Maybe that's why Jesus did it.

Me: Yeah, to get from point A to point B.

Conversations with my Boyfriend

Boyfriend: Do non-Catholics cross themselves?
Me: No. I don't think so.
Boyfriend: Why not?
Me: Well, in order to answer that question we'd have to know why Catholics do cross themselves. Do you know why Catholics do cross themselves?
Boyfriend: No.
Me: Well, when we know why Catholics cross themselves we might be able to figure out why non-Catholics don't... maybe.

Question of the day: Why do Catholics cross themselves (make the sign of the cross)?

Resting Place

This photo was recovered from my cell phone this afternoon after a long bus ride across town which happened to pass by this small cemetery. Would you like to be buried here? Within view of this enormous Church? I would not. Not only is it on a major busline, it's directly across the street from a Discount Drug Mart. That's right. The final resting place of these few poor souls is at gravestone level with the parking lot of a ghetto-fabulous drug store. A discount drug store. I'm pretty sure that when St. Patrick's chose the corner of Puritas and Rocky River Drive in 1851 it was probably a spacious lovely area. A fitting burial place for devout Catholic believers of the parish. But now... yes, now. Not the same.
But whereas we are skiddish of such garish juxtaposes and quiver at the thought of Slurpee cups tossed over the fence onto our memorial plaques, I doubt the dead mind it nearly so much as we do and it would certainly be a sobering sight for any would-be robbers. They are such even-minded folk, the dead. Sometimes I admire them for their composure. Or decomposure. However you want to look at it.

Sweeping Generalization Thursday

"Anyone who's attended Catholic school has a fear of nuns."

White and Delightsome

Each time I descend into the the city turning in the air above the Great Salt Lake it gets worse. It's a kind of dread. A revulsion. A fear. It's culture shock, actually. I know what I'm in for and each time I fly into the city it gets harder to want to be there. I am lowered by plane into the very belly of the great white, clean, beast that is Mormonism.

It begins as the plane leaves from wherever it comes from before it reaches Salt Lake. On the flight there are a handful of clean, white business men talking about politics, work and their families. Their moral code is apparent in their speech and their cleanliness leaves a sickly sweetness in the air. They are: clean-shaven, carefully coiffed, dressed in upscale clothes and dazzlingly white.

Arriving is worse. The airport is like the two men on the plane only multiplied. All white, all clean, all living by the code of their secret society. Of course, there are also immigrants working at the airport and there are tourists leaving the city so it's not a complete white out.

But by the time I reach my hotel, two blocks from temple square, the transformation is complete. The only thing I see from my window over the street are small herds of white, blonde, church-dressed families. Mostly groups of seven or eight or twelve walking toward the tabernacle with smiles on their faces. All the males wearing black pants and white shirts. All the females in seemingly the same frumpy dress in pastel shades. And as they march along the upper way in the clean streets of Salt Lake, in the immaculate morning air, I shudder.

This is my own personal hell.

Everyone the same: Women like little dowdy stepford wives. The men like Agent Smiths. Each a perfect facsimile of the other. All perfectly, horrifyingly alike.

It was on this trip that the phrase white and delightsome first came to my ears. Not that the Mormons are racist or anything, but apparently if a person with skin darker than whey becomes Mormon they can someday hope to become "white and delightsome" like the rest of the pasty-faced crew when god decides to reverse the curse that is their blemished skin. Lovely.

Of course since 1981 the LDS church decided that "white" really just meant "pure" and all the scriptures were changed accordingly. Now it's ok to be a Mormon and also to be black. And you don't need god to change your skin color or anything for you to be truly blessed. Of course no white Mormon is gonna marry you either. But you understand.

I won't touch Polygamy and the Mormons in this rant, even though the practice is alive and well. (Ok, I will say this: It's officially "not condoned" anymore, but of course polygamy was the very cause of Joseph Smith's "martyrdom" and therefore a foundational tenant of the religion.) There is more than I want to discuss in this one post already.

Flying away from the city, I kept my eyes on that lake; big and dead and lovely. Three sides of the valley are surrounded by mountains all changing colors for the Fall. Such a beautiful place.

I was so glad to leave it.

Yes or No?

Chez Joel writes on How to Find God in Three Arduous Steps.
I thought it was pretty well-formed. You read it and tell me what you think...

A tale of polygamy and the law.