Singing Website Day

I declare today to be Annoying Musical Website Day! Join in the fun by finding your own Annoying Musical Website! Try to find the most obnoxious one, or two or three.

Daily Lunch Bagger 9/27/06

Let's face it, with a new job position (I got a promotion before I got hired!) and the learning curve it will indubitably carry, I won't have the wherewithall to post a daily lunch bag. Let alone a daily post. For a short while. (I don't actually have a lunch break at the moment, so technically there's not an actual lunch time in which to Blog.)

And there it is.

But for today I give you a little "aww" moment: Shasta Saved! (See? Some dogs do go to live on a farm when they get old!) Also note that barfing is bad and raw meat is a "dangeous" fad. Yuck. This Lunch Bag is turning ugly....

How about let's turn our attention to immigration? In the mid 90's, do you know who the top sending countries were for naturalized US Citizens? Check it out.

And for diss-ert, a little Grumble Cake from the local news...

Daily Lunch Bag - 9/22/2006

Since I have a real job now (thank you to everyone who supported and encouraged me during these trying times), I also now have real work and cannot, as I was wont to do, use up substantial amounts of time blogging on the employers clock. So, I shall cram everything I'm gathering into a Lunch bag, so to speak. And I realize you won't all take lunch at noon EST, but you can still appreciate the snack. Enjoy!


Extreme Ironing: Because ironing wasn't exciting enough... (thanks, mymo)










The many uses of Peroxide








And for dessert:

Cookies

Huh?

One for the "what is it?" file:

Kids Say The Darndest Things

This edition of Kids Say The Darndest Things is brought you by the collected resources of myself and my coworkers and the wonderful little children in our lives. Enjoy!

Mommy: I have a baby growing in my tummy, that's why it's so big.
Two year old: Oh. Mommy, do you have a baby growing in your bottom, too?

Little girl annoys everyone around her with her new gifts of a dress, perfume and wristwatch demanding that everyone she meets see her dress, smell her perfume and listen to her wristwatch. Her parents tell her to stop as it becomes unbearably repetitious. They go out to dinner at a restaurant and the little girl is desperate to show off her new Birthday wealth. So when the waitress arrives at her table she bursts out, "If you see something, hear something, and smell something then it's probably me!"

A woman on a bus with her niece tries to convince her not to bite her nails, "If you keep doing that your tummy will swell up!" she says. So the little girl stops and as they get off the bus, she says to a pregnant woman near the front, "I know what you've been doing."

At a dinner of Chinese food, a five year old watches me eating with chopsticks and asks what they are. "Chinese people use them to eat their food," I tell him. The boy slides off his chair and sidles over to his mother and whispers in her ear, "Mom, is Sarah Chinese?"

A little three year old boy is asked to give a speech during his birthday celebration. So he stands up on his chair and delivers the following words: "I would like to thank all of you for coming to my birthday party and I hope that every one of you goes straight to hell." That little boy is now 78 years old.

Weekend Escape Hatch (with Deer)

So it's Friday. (Yes, it really is.) I know deer get a bad rap: deer in the headlights, and all that. Well, deer are apparently fed up and they're not gonna take it anymore! Let this short video help cleanse the aggression of your work week and give you peaceful energy as you head into your respective weekends!

New England Confectionary Company

Did you know that the letters in NECCO (as in NECCO wafers candy) stood for something? I was communing with a roll of the thin wafers last evening before bed (a fine way to go to sleep; belly full of sugar) when I happened to read the wrapper: New England Confectionary Company... Well now it's ruined for me! It actually stands for something. It's not just a cute little name someone thought up in an advertising meeting that lasted long into the night. *sigh* Oh well. It's nice that they shortened New England Confectionary Company down to NECCO. And they taste good too.

Do you know what their flavors are?

My guesses: white-cinnamon, pink-spearmint(counterintuitively), green-wintermint?, yellow-banana(maybe), beige-clove, dark blue-licorice, orange-orange (in a surprise move by the flavor department). (Check my answers against the website. [hint: scroll down to eight original flavors question] Hmm, not very good! I forgot chocolate!)

If you haven't had a NECCO, go out and buy a roll. They really are the strangest little things, but oh-so-good.

All Creatures Great and Small

This video made me ask the question, "How much jail time is represented here?" And also made me ask the question, "Why is it so easy to take candy from babies?" And I also wondered, "Why would Republicans and Democrats want to be represented by animals?" This video also made me think, "Birds are really greedy" and "monkeys are kind of vicious!" You go ahead and watch the video and see if it makes you talk to yourself.

Song From The Cubicle

Tired of being ignored in your 2 meter squared domain? Here's a song about the woes of cubicle life. And after you've listened to it you can imagine you have the fabulous cubicle Scott Adams created. It'll be like a little cubicle get-away as you continue surfing the web and ignoring your job.

Why Are Bunnies So Judgemental?

Bunnies are not your friends. They intrinsically disapprove of all you do. You may be distracted by their long ears and furry faces and funny walks, but bunnies are glowering on the inside. As evidenced by this set of Disapproving Bunnies. My family had bunnies when I was young. One of them killed off the other because their cage was too small. Bunnies disapprove of confined spaces.

And The Winners Are...

Our k_sra Photoshop Contest has ended and the Winners are hereby announced!

First Place:

Titanic
by Steve DeGroof























Second Place:

Where's Sozza?
by Gnomethang












Third Place:

Bermuda Profile
by Dr. Curry








And as my sentimental favorite:

Mount Rushmore
by Jinbish










Congratulations to all our Winners! And now I bet you're just dying to know what Fabulous Prizes you've won...

First Place Prize Winner wins a real, honest to goodness piece of k_sra pottery! (read: I'm tired of storing it, but I want it to go to a good home[photos posted later.]) ALL Prize Winners will receive a beautiful copy [editor's note: "beautiful" is a relative term; copies may actually be quite ugly.] of their winning entry (or they may request another picture if so desired) signed by k_sra and shipped to them in their respective country!

Well done, Everyone! You're a credit to the Internet Community! Thanks for making this the best contest ever!

9/11 Remembrance Hole

Honoring the Hole.

Apple

When I was a little girl I met a wonderful-smelling lady at a picnic who was tall and had long, brown, wavy hair. Her voice was soft and she smiled often. As we sat in the grass, I watched her eat an apple. She ate the whole thing; top to bottom, back to front. Everything. Including the stem. I was slightly scared of her after that.

A New Dance

The Chartered Accountant

Learn it. Love it!

And the Winner Is...

I know I said I would announce the winner today, Friday, September 7th, 2006, but I can't, I just can't! I've gotten a couple more class entries and I want the vote machine to work, but it won't, so I don't want to let you down, but Winners (that's right, there will be more than one) WILL be announced next TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 12, 2006. Mark your calendars (for real this time and revote for your favorites - check out the new ones). No new entries will be allowed after 7pm EST this evening.
Have a great weekend!

Photshop Contest So Far!

Here's the entries so far for the K_sra Photoshop Contest. I've included a poll in the sidebar for this contest so you can have a vote on your favorite! Any last minute entries will be displayed tomorrow along with the winners (or maybe as the winners).
Original is at the top. Contestant entries are below. (And below that. Couldn't fit them all in one post!)

The Work Horse Cometh

So, get this: I had an interview this morning. Now don't laugh at me when you hear who the interview was with. I know you're going to laugh, so don't laugh. OK? No laughing! I mean it. I interviewed for an exec assistant gig with this guy.

You laughed, didn't you?

I saw him at church on Sunday and told him my current predicament and he offered to consider my resume for a job as his highly-payed personal assistant. I waffled for two days. I mean, come on, how seriously could I take an offer from a guy who was trying to describe our married life together the first (and last) time we met up? But the time ate at me and my conscious nagged, 'You'd have a job offer to show other employers. You'll have a competitive wage offer to set the standard by. AND you'll have a blog post worthy of reading!' So I steeled myself and went. Ready to bolt at the least display of creepiness. He showed up with a neck brace on. I laughed. Out loud. The pain from his neck injury (car accident) subdued his usual enthusiasm and I thought, gratefully, 'At least he won't be able to attack me, because of the pain in his neck.'

But he didn't attack at all. We sat in his office and talked about the job, about life, about love, about real estate, about God. It was, altogether, a fairly pleasant conversation. A lot nicer than the first wherein I was credited with male genitalia.

I still don't want to work for him. I told him the commute was prohibitive (which it is) and I wasn't motivated by the salary or sales commissions (which I'm not). I thanked him and casually told him about my part time job. "Visa work?" he bellowed, "Hold on!" He picked up his earpiece and stuffed it in his ear lobe which was resting on the large white foam collar around his neck. "Vanesh, where are you? Get over here fast. I found someone who can help with your visa problem." My eyes went wide. I don't remember telling him I was an expert in visa work. He pulls out the earpiece and says, "He'll be here in five minutes, but should've been here at nine. I'll show you around." We walked through the office - nice office - and to the front reception area. I am expressing my disinclination for the job when I rememebr another friend who I think would suit. "Do you have his number?" asks Rick, the Director with a neck brace. "Sure. I'll call him now." I call my friend, he says 'thanks but no thanks' and meanwhile Vanesh shows up and I am herded into a conference room and sat down. Rick leaves us with one of those, "you want anything to drink" moves. Vanesh then pours out his I-140 sob story and I feel like one of those characters in a mistaken identity comedy where a garbage man is mistaken for a cardinal so I just listen. I take the parts of what he says that make sense and say them back to him and admit ignorance on the rest. He seems satisfied with my conclusion so I am allowed to leave. I run from the building and take a deep breath.

I am now at my one and only part time job, wasting precious company time telling you this story. And as an added note of good cheer, I've been given all the hours I want. Thanks, Irish Boss! You came through for me!

k_sra float fund

I managed to set up a PayPal donation button in the top right corner there. Nothing fancy. For those of you who would like to throw away your money on your favorite time wasting blogger, more power to you. I won't say no. As a matter of fact, for a limited time (through October), I will feature donors who wish to be so featured at the top of the blog under the title. I'll give you a fake title, like Earl of Bathwater, and post any picture you send (can be you or your cat, I don't care) in the title bar. To be fair to all my donors, I will give each a week atop the Big Board.

You are a fabulous lot and I owe you a lot more than songs and games and puzzles and knowledge!

Steve Irwin Dies

In an appropriately bizarre animal related death, Steve Irwin, beloved Australian wildlife specialist and entertainer leaves the rest of us wondering who's going to wrestle all those alligators for us? Who's going to hunt crocodiles now and say things in his deliciously strong accent like, "Isn't she a beaut? She could reelly tayk a bayt outta ya!"

A sting ray, in an unlikely turn of events, pierced Irwin through the heart with its ten inch barbed tail during the filming of a TV show on the Great Barrier Reef, killing the film personality instantly. He was dead before the film crew pulled him from the water. He leaves behind a wife, two children, and millions of loyal fans. Myself included.

Words I Don't Know: 'L'

Let's have a little fun with 'L' shall we? I always get on here and rattle off the words I don't know from my tiny pocket dictionary, so here's a chance to have a little bit more fun with it. I'll give you a few definitions and you guess what the word it is. Each begins with the letter 'L'. It won't be difficult, but you might be surprised at how the dictionary people jump through hoops to avoid using the word itself. Write down your answers to see how you did. Answers in the annos.

1. A delicate fabric in a web like pattern.

2. The front part of a seated person from the lower trunk to the knees.

3. A device that produces highly amplified coherent light.

4. To produce sounds expressive of mirth or derision.

5. Of, at or on the side of the body that faces north when the subject is facing east.

6. Bits of fiber and fluff.

7. To cause to sleep, soothe

8. To execute without due process of law.

And here are the words I actually don't know:

lacuna: an empty space or missing part.
lambent: flickering lightly over a surface, OR effortlessly brilliant, OR gently glowing, luminous.
lea: a meadow.
limpid: crystal clear, transparent

Mouse Potato Gets Into Dictionary

You heard it here first! (thanks, Honestus.)